Counters!

Now here's a step, if done right, will guarantee that no one will ever visit your site again. What is it you annoyingly ask? Well, it's adding a web counter. But a counter isn't annoying you say? Well, if you know how to do them the right way, then they aren't. But if you mimic the way so many others do them, then they are annoying as hell.

Here are some ways to have annoying counters:

Get the biggest, ugliest counter you can find.
Get a trick counter or one that doesn't work (hilarious!).
Go to your page and click refresh 5000 times so it seems everyone goes to your site.
Put a counter up even if you get 1 hit a month (once they see that they'll all be flocking to your web page).

Here is an example web page that annoys me with the counter:

Welcome to my company's page on the internet. We've been around for many years. Bla Bla Bla

Here are our web site
hits since April 8, 1997:

Remember our slogan: "You really have all your confidence in us!"

Now you really confidence in them to buy diamonds. What idiots! Why don't they just say their company's nothing and you should go to someone else. But how do I know all this? Because they went out of their way to say it.

But you say you want some way of seeing your site's hits? Then do what I do...get a web tracker from NedStat. This company offers an easy way to see who has been to your site, when, and from what country. It can also see what search engine they came from. And the only icon you have to put on your web site is this:

Web Counters